Me, my inner perfectionist and my blog

I am struggling.. overwhelmed and tired..
My brain is about to explode.

"Keep it simple" they say, "don't over think it", "just do it". I  understand all that, I just can't.

My inner perfectionist is holding me back, she says my words need to have a meaning, they need to have a purpose and they must be PERFECT.
There needs to be no spelling, grammatical or structural mistakes, my text needs to have a good flow, it needs to be musical too!
REALLY? who does that?

The truth is, I need to write. And my inner perfectionist can just sit there and watch while I do it.
It won't be perfect, it might have mistakes, and sometimes it even might be meaningless. But its mine and I have the right to present it just the way I want to. 

It all begins here...

I am easily distracted… I am an optimistic that sometimes slips away from reality… I am a perfectionist that’s hardly perfect…
Yet I try… To stay focused… I try to be realistic… And I try to have things as close to perfect as possible…

I am also a warrior… and a worrier… I fight through fire, and I never give up… I worry about everything… and I try to fight that too…

I am sensitive but I am outspoken… I don’t think before I say things…but I always over think what I write…

I am constantly looking for answers… and I know that a lot of them are waiting to unfold themselves just when it’s the right time… But I am also impatient… I want to know everything now… I want to do it all now… And I want to have it all now…

I have a few personal battles that I still haven’t won… and it’s been a long journey… But as I am here today… finally coming to write about it… I believe I may actually overcome my fears and my weakness and win some of them…

I write for my own pleasure… I see it as a way to reflect and self explore… but the more I try to make it look and sound perfect… the harder it gets to get my words out…

So it all begins here… my fight against the need for perfection… my fight against my weakness… and my fight against my personal critic…

Any page that survives those is a winner… it all begins here…